I know what you’re thinking…I’ve been conspicuously absent from this blog for several months now. Well, more likely you haven’t noticed at all, but let’s just go with the former anyway. After much soul searching and deep self examination, I have discovered, and am prepared to reveal the reason for my absence. Ok, so I really only had to think about it for 5 seconds to realize why, but let’s go with the former again…it just sounds cooler.
Anyway, I’ve been M.I.A. for most of the summer because I don’t like writing about it when I suck. I'm simply not inspired to tell stories of my own poor performances, mistakes and mishaps. However, therein lies yet another error in judgment on my part. For what is the purpose of writing about bike racing? Is it to tell the world how great a mountain biker I am? Is it to prove that I train my ass off so I can compete at a high level and win races? Is it just to show off??? Fuck no. If anything it’s to be mildly entertaining to the dozen or so people who actually read these yarns, and maybe provide a platform for someone to learn something from my experiences (Again, probably just the former). I am a fairly humble individual; I lose graciously and sincerely congratulate those who beat me. I don’t think I have a terribly huge ego, so why not share my failures?...They’re probably more interesting than my successes.
So submitted for your approval, is a significantly less detailed than usually rundown of my (mis) adventures on the bike since I last checked in:
-Stoopid 50 weekend, State College PA.
Given that I was chasing M.A.S.S. points, this was an important race, so it stands to reason that I’d rest up and be ready for it right? Wrong. Since the Bearscsat 50 two weeks earlier (which was hard as shit), I had done too much training and not enough resting. I rode this race, well...Stoopidly. I went out too hard at the start and by mile 25 was pretty much toast. My team mates Bill and Daniel were well ahead of me, and sport racers were dropping me on the climbs. I limped home in survival mode for the last half of the race, finishing a pitiful 12th in the Masters field. Great course though, and a great weekend with the BTR/EMP team. Trip highlights: Going to a surprisingly good strip club on Friday night (watching RogieRog get motorboated was priceless), and the comedy of seeing all the Joe Paterno gear still on display in town (The JOPA Legacy Pillow…really???).
-Vermont Vacation:
No tales of woe here…in fact this trip was pretty much flawless from start to finish. For 2 weeks in June and July I hit Vermont and the Adirondaks with the bikes and the dog in tow. I hung out and rode with TJ & Bill, visited with family, ate tons of great food, swam in cool mountain rivers, explored some sweet new trails in Hinesburg Forest and Millstone Quarry and even competed in 3 training races. Training race highlight: demoing a $10.5k Specialized S-Works Epic at Catamount which they foolishly allowed me to race…I brought it back an hour later after crashing it 3 times and covering it with 3 pounds of Vermud. They didn't seem to care.
The trip culminated with 3 days of fun, fast riding in the incredible Kingdom Trails of Burke, VT with the Black Bear Cycling crew. This trail system is simply awesome. It was as seriously good trip, and totally free of mishaps.
-The Fair Hill classic 50 miler:
Another MASS points race. After my SaD showing at the Stoopid, I realized that I needed to step up my speed work, which I did during my Vermont trip by doing lots of shorter hard efforts and training races. I was feeling fast and very prepared for this one. But you know what they say about the best laid plans…After a good start I was sitting right on Roger Masse’s wheel at about mile 6, when I overcooked a corner and skidded my face across the loose ground, skewering my lip with a sharp stick. After the initial shock from the sight of my own blood wore off, I realized I wasn’t mortally wounded and soldierd on. But after that crash I wasn’t quite the same… and by mile 22, the Roy Rogers sausage, egg & cheese biscuit I had eaten (against my own better judgment) that morning was turning my intestines into a volcanic battlefield. Let’s just say I didn’t even make it back to the start/finish area without a couple of stops to fertilize the woods. By the time I did, I was in no shape to continue. I had earned my first DNF of the season. Great, just great.
Rattling Creek Marathon, MASS Endurance Series finals.
Obviously, an important race. I’d done the math and I knew that unless Roger DNF’d this one, that he had the series victory locked up tight. I still needed to finish in the top 10 to hold my second place series standing over David Funk if he were to beat me here. By all accounts, this was the best course in the series and I’m now inclined to agree. It’s mostly singletrack and very rocky…usually my kinda stuff, but not today. This race made me realize once and for all that I’m just too damn old to be doing technical endurance races on a hardtail! I vowed, never again.
I had a good start. Bill (Christman, my team mate and fellow Masters racer) were riding together in 3rd & 4th when I flatted. Bill raced on, and after some profane outbursts and a little finagling, I got my tire to seal, re-inflated it and got back in the race. I pushed a bit too hard to catch back on though, and the non-stop rocky singletrack was taking its toll on me. By the midway point I had slowed considerably and was reduced yet again to survival mode. I got passed by JW in the last few miles but managed to hang on for 5th place in the Masters field. It really was an incredible course that truly lived up to the hype. Far from a great performance by me, but what mattered is that I had held on to my Second Place overall in the series…an achievement that I’m pretty damn proud of. Roger took the win and clinched the series victory in commanding fashion. Contrats Rog!
Mooch Madness:
This was really more of a long XC race (28 rocky miles) than and endurance race, held in one of my favorite local riding spots, Allamuchy State Park. In looking at my calendar, I thought this might be one of my last bids for a possible win this season, but I went in without any real expectations. In keeping to my own self promise of not doing any more long, technical races on my hardtail, I borrowed TJ’s Rumblefish for this one. The ‘Fish has 5” of downhill crushing, rock garden devouring travel and it’s a pure joy to ride. Of course at around 30 lbs, it’s also a complete dog on the climbs, but at ‘Mooch I felt the pros would outweigh the cons, so to speak.
I had been riding the bike all week and loving it; unfortunately, TJ had the wheels set up with tubes, and because you can ride the rocks so aggressively on it, I was flatting on every ride. So Bill kindly let me use the wheels from his own Rumblefish, which were set up tubeless (or so we thought), for the race.
Bill and I got out to an early lead in the Masters category, and before long we had a sizeable lead on the rest of the field. A few miles in his SPD cleat fell off and he had to stop and secure it; I gave him my multi tool and raced on, feeling very strong. The ‘Fish was eating up the rocky course and I was all alone in front with a good lead until about mile 20. I bottomed out in a downhill rock garden and flatted the rear tire. I tried to get it to seal but nothin’ doin” FUCK!!
It was then that I realized, in what is by far the most brain-dead maneuver of my entire season; that I had forgotten to put my spare tube in my jersey pocket! I started prepping the wheel while I waited for someone with an extra tube to pass by. In doing so I realized that the back wheel had a damn tube in it all along! My stupidity and unpreparedness was compounding itself by the minute. The 2nd place Masters guy went by after about 4 minutes. TJ was right behind him and he stopped and gave me his spare tube. By the time I fixed it and got rolling again, I knew there was no way I would be catching the Masters leader. I’d lost too much time, and the lactic acid had build up in my legs during the 10 minutes I was off the bike. I pretty much soft pedaled the last few miles, and crawled in for…you guessed it…another second place finish. It was a comedy (or maybe a tragedy?) of errors, but still a fun day on a really great course.
So now that summer is nearly over, it’s time to review my season so far and make some observations.
Tuscarora Endurance: 2nd
Michaux Trail Cup: 2nd
Iron Hill Endurance: 2nd
French Creek Endurance: 3rd
Bearscat 50: 3rd
Stoopid 50: 12th
Catamount Training Race #1: 2nd (40-49, on a sweet demo S-Works Epic)
Onion River Training Race #1: 2nd (to some Vermont guy)
Onion River Training Race #2: 2nd (to Dan from Black Bear)
Fair Hill Endurance: DNF
Rattling Creek 50: 5th (after flatting)
Mid Atlantic Super Series Masters Endurance overall standing: 2nd
Mooch Madness: 2nd (after flatting)
Overall it’s been a pretty good season. I started strong, faded, rebounded, made some stupid mistakes, learned from them, and most importantly, I’ve had fun. But come on, 7…that’s right, 7 second place finishes???!!! And not one victory!!! I couldn’t feel more like a bridesmaid if I put on a blond wig and an ugly pink chiffon dress.
Looking forward, there are a couple more possible endurance events on the horizon, plus maybe some XC races and cyclocross. I foresee several more second place finishes in my near future. Who knows, maybe I’ll actually win one!
-G
